Summer's here and the time is right... for comics starring non-scary ghosts and their low-impact adventures, suitable for small children, recovering cardiac patients, and the copyright lawyers on retainer at Harvey Comics. Yes, it's time to get timid with Timmy The Timid Ghost!

"Never pass up a chance to imitate somebody else's successful property," says Charlton Comics, hellbent on keeping their former cereal-box press rolling day and night, pumping out hot rod comics and teen romance comics and weird mystery comics and whatever this is.

Summer is here, as previously stated! Like so many of us, off-brand Casper and Great Value Winsome Witch here are spending a day at a beach, a specific beach which seems to be ground zero for America's obesity epidemic.

One of the many benefits of being a ethereal spirit ghost person is that you aren't affected by earthly concerns like pain, cold or heat. Except when you are!

Another feature of ghosthood is your absolute lack of material substance, which means you'll never be picked up and thrown by cigar-smoking beach louts. So either Timmy is doing this whole thing wrong, or Cigar Guy is some kind of spirit-sensing wizard.

Ghosts can get pinched by crabs? I'm starting to think that this comic's conception of "ghost" is even less accurate than its conception of "crabs"

It's the human teeth that really make this image a horrifying nightmare. Thanks Timmy!

Katsushika Hokusai, known simply as Hokusai, was a Japanese ukiyo-e artist of the Edo period, active as a painter and printmaker. He is best known for the woodblock print series Thirty-Six Views of Mount Fuji, which includes the iconic print The Great Wave off Kanagawa. - Wikipedia

So if you've ever wondered who buys those pirate flags you see people selling from vans in gas station parking lots - Wilma Witch here is the target market.

Depictions of the Madonna And Child date back to the 2nd century and are central to religious portraiture, sculpture, and knockoff ghost comics.

Here's a beach safety tip, wait a full hour after eating before going back in the water. Also - you'll need a nap, so just bring your pillow from home, right off your bed. How else are you going to get a good rest?

Here Timmy merely reflects the concerns of the reader back AT the reader, breaking the fourth wall and ushering in a new era of self-aware meta media. Yes Timmy. Something IS wrong. We ARE all sick. Of this comic.

Those wacky beach kids, refraining from the kind of terrified shrieking normally expected when learning the beach is filled with ghosts and witches!

Katsushika Hokusai, known simply as Hokusai, was a Japanese ukiyo-e artist of the... yeah, you get it.

Wouldn't it be ironic if Timmy The Timid Ghost is a ghost because he was a child who drowned? Just some fun thoughts to have while enjoying your hilarious kids' comic.

Don't you worry Timmy, I took a course in lifesaving. Which is... not at all applicable here.

Whatever radioactive contamination or chemical pollution mutating these people into blobby, hat-sporting monsters seeems to be growing more powerful!

Just what we needed, another "balloon boy." I hope this one doesn't turn out to be a hoax!

We're with you, seagulls. Fun? You think this is fun?

Seagulls are like the pigeons of the ocean. And I guess you could say pigeons are the seagulls of the cities. And they're both kind of like rats with wings. So shoo, you nasty seagulls. Definitely shoo.

They were in a beach shop two minutes ago, they could have bought a raft or a float or a ring or water wings. But no, it's all "let's tie Timmy to a log."

When Timmy said he wanted to "get ripped" this is NOT what he had in mind!

I guess this is enough swimming, or whatever it is you can call this, for the day. So that means this comic is over, right? We can find something more entertaining to do, like watching paint dry, or researching Charlton Comics' mob ties? Right?

Nope, still going. Our story continues as a little tugboat arrives to visit the mutants of this decrepit hellscape.

Speaking of mutants, check this tug captain out! Just put those eyeballs anywhere, right on the misshapen nose, that's fine. Now let's pull up to the nearest beach and hire some salvage divers, just like pulling into the Home Depot parking lot and hiring some day labor.

Sure I'm sure salvage diving is safe! Safe as anything you can do that involves killing pressures, potential explosions, crush hazards, suffocation and drowning!

So THIS is why the water has that pinkish hue around here, the great bubble gum freighter disaster of '03!

Oh no, what will Timmy The Ghost do without air? Will he die again and become a double ghost?

You and me both Wilma. You and me both. At least you got a swell vintage diving suit out of the deal, now you can open a seafood restaurant and stand it in the corner as a decoration!

Soon we're back at Timmy's ghost home, where we learn ghosts have ghost moms and ghost grandmothers and ghost birthdays.

(you can tell she's Ghost Mom because of the "M" on her ghost sheet) Well, at least Timmy can now enjoy swimming without waves or crabs or hot sand or shirtless cigar haters flinging him all over the place. Enjoy the rest of your ghost summer Timmy!

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