Would you like to have more brains? Sure, we all would. But here's Lois Lane to tell you being an "egg" head isn't always what it's "cracked up" to be!


If there's one thing Metropolis has an abundance of, it's wacky scientists with extremely specific inventions; there's so many of them random people come in to talk with them, like stewardesses on short layovers.


The professor makes sure to outline the premise of this Lois Lane story.


Sure enough, faster than you can say "I SAID LUNCH, NOT LAUNCH" Lois gives herself an extra dose of brain. It'd be funny if she was still wearing her little pillbox hat and that's what got smart.


It's too bad Lois didn't add her own brain to the brain bank instead of making a withdrawal-- she could've imparted knowledge I doubt any of those other guys could contribute, namely, "how to go on a date"


Lois is lucky she's only got the astronomer's thoughts about stars in her head if you ask me. I wonder if the brain bank has firewalls around each of the famous scientist's spank banks. I hope so!


I'd assumed absorbing a lot of knowledge would just make your brain bumpier, not increase its physical size but there wouldn't be much of a story if Lois was just trying to hide her lumpy brain from Superman. And yes, that is Lois's discarded hair on her pillow, that honestly grosses me out way more than a bulbuous head.


Of course the only thing this thirsty bitch is worried about is that Superman won't find her hot anymore. Don't worry Lois, your boobs are still the same size.


Lois has overnight become a genius in the field of Covering Up Your Giant Head


You young folks wouldn't remember this, but back in the 1950s all the big panel game shows were filmed live in Metropolis. They eventually moved production to Hollywood, once they realized Metropolis isn't a real place.


Lois enters her newly-constructed Mind Palace to pursue her new passion, covering up her giant head.


Leave it to fucking Steve Allen to make a joke shaming a woman for her looks. Ugh, fuck that guy.

(this Stupid Comics is being brought to you by the Society for Preserving Bizarre Mid 20th Century Grudges)


I don't really have anything to say about this panel, I'm just putting it up in case anyone ever does a Google Image Search for "eerily accurate renderings of 1950s TV hosts"


Whatever, at least Lois is using her giant brain in a truly noble pursuit: making a chump out of that douchebag Steve Allen. Fuck that guy!


What amazing solution will the giant brain provide us with this time? I wonder?


Leave it to Lois to do some Mythbusting and not flinching even a little as ants bite her skull.


Lois goes into exile where she will disguise herself as "Person with Veil Draped Over Enormous Skull"


OK, so we've pinpointed the location of Metropolis as being a few days' drive from Las Vegas.


Too bad it's not far enough away to keep some of its residents from blowing their savings at the blackjack tables though!


OK but did the private eye also have a giant cranium? Because that probably makes slinking a lot more difficult. Still, it's nice to know being a super genius helps Lois count to 20.


Thanks to Lois's math expertise, this guy will shortly be getting a nice invitation to the back room to meet with Joe Pesci and a ballpeen hammer.


Ten seconds later buddy is betting everything on 23 black (there is no 23 black)


Possibly the first appearance of a science fiction convention in a comic book?


Almost cetainly the first appearance of creepy dudes pawing at the one female at a science fiction convention (in a comic book; in real life it'd been happening since the 1930s)


Not to be confused with tears of shame because she's hanging out at sci fi cons.


And finally, the moment promised on the splash page, Lois gets lectured at by Superman?


Nope. Ah well,


Not "Lucy told me about what happened". He chose the creepiest possible explanation. It's a given he's gonna accidentally overhear things not intended for his ears but he doesn't have to admit it!


So... he didn't show up to fix the size of her head, he just wanted her hair to grow back. I should've known the last son of the enlightened planet Krypton wouldn't be a boob man, he's a hair man.


Maybe you're back to normal, or maybe you're some form of ugly even the Bizarros find ugly? Not everything can be binaries.


Speak for yourself Lois, I love my big fat brain.

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