Back in the good old days of the Cold War, we didn't have newfangled, fancy contraptions like e-mail and messaging services that drunks and useful idiots could leak classified information on, we had to spy the OLD FASHIONED way! Sometimes we didn't even need to use drunks and useful idiots, all it took was one desperate, horny guy to get the spy ball rolling! Like the guy in this story, for instance.


You never know what you're getting when you try to pick up women at the opera-- sure it's a classy joint and all, but what if they're a spy? Or what if they have the clap? In either case, best to let them know right away that you're with the US embassy.


When you're a diplomat in a friendly country, it's perfectly fine to display totally normal behaviour such as sniffing around Paris like a cat in heat-- hey, it worked for that Thomas O'Malley guy from The Aristocats, didn't it?


Few know this but in the 1950s Bastille Night was also known as "Night of Big Hats"


Boy, she sure does seem like she's after something, all right, the way she's recoiling from his touch like a regular Mata Hari.


A while after throwing himself at her, asking her marital status, and insisting they spend the night together, Joe finally remembers to ask her name. Phew, don't wanna rush things there guy! She might get ideas you actually give a shit about her beyond her looks! Even the photocopied dancing girls agree.


Note to would-be Romeos: A woman refusing to answer any personal questions beyond her name and whether or not she's engaged is NOT a red flag at all! Especially not when she runs away yelling for a taxi right after kissing you. Proceed without caution, you won't need it! You're doing great!!


I'm sure that during the Cold War, receiving mysterious letters with no return address to your desk at the embassy was no big deal, not suspicious at all.


Also not suspicious: having to suddenly leave restaurants for no apparent reason, meeting only in "quiet, out of the way" places, yelling STOP IT when you propose.


Since Joe is some sort of cold war diplomat at some point he's going to have to do his job, and his job is knowing the Russians inside and out! There's not a thing about Russia or its people that Joe don't know!


Except that his girlfriend is one.


I mean you should've known she was only after your state secrets, Joe, the way she threw herself at you and plied you with questions about yourself and insisted on seeing you constantly... oh wait

Also love how he's saying all that out loud. Buddy, people have been shot for less than what you've just admitted to.


Even in the 50s it's rare to see the hero in a romance comic just become utterly unhinged like this. It's a good thing she turned down his marriage proposal!


You can tell they hate Commies by the way they're ineptly playing ping-pong. Anyway, you know it's bad when even the hero's co-worker buddies think he's a louse. And how stupid is this guy that it didn't occur to him she'd get in trouble for this?


...THIS stupid, I guess.


Is it just me? I kind of feel like none of these guys should be working for the US embassy. Maybe diplomacy's just not right for them.


What?! No, lady, if it wasn't for him you wouldn't have been almost "purged" by Kruschev. He completely turned on you because you gave him a fake name and have different political opinions, he is literally the worst.

On the other hand, if she'd had any sense at all in the first place, she could've just told him up front, "by the way I'm a Communist and work for the Russian government" the first time he started pestering her and saved herself a lot of trouble.
Yeah, have fun with that guys, you're gonna be the happiest couple in the world for about 2 minutes before you're both arrested on suspicion of espionage by the United States government. Say hi to the Rosenbergs for me! Oh, you can't, they were executed 5 years before this comic was published. Oops!!

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